BA Games CEO Discovered To Be Vessel For Dark Lord

The world of gaming was today shocked into disarray when the CEO of BA Games was discovered as the vessel for the Dark Lord, and was promptly vanquished by a young boy and his cohorts.

Jean Donatello was first brought in as the CEO back in 2007, and prompted the dawn of several unique franchises. “Truth be told, we only hired him because we thought he was one of those Ninja Turtles”, Board Member Brent Faversham told us, wishing to remain anonymous as he did so. “At first we thought that he’d bring us into a new era of gaming; first he wanted to bring in new IP and reduce the cost of videogames for the consumer, but then one day after taking a fishing trip everything changed.”

“At first he just started mumbling to himself, then after a while he started bringing in a pussycat to stroke during meetings. We all thought it was a bit weird, but none of us were going to say anything, because maybe he just liked cats?” However, things soon took a darker turn.

“At one point, I remember he actually grew a moustache and began twirling it in his fingers as he explained we were going to force players to put in codes to access the multiplayer or pay extra money to do so, then shut off the servers after a year anyway. After this point he began using the extra money to start looking for some kind of stone, but no-one could remember if he said “Philatelist’s” or “Saucisson’s”. Seems like those words would be hard to get confused with each other if you ask me”, which we did.

His efforts took him to a state secondary school where he posed as a teacher instructed with helping the students defend themselves against the Dark Arts. One student was only too happy to speak with us, and thus we’ve protected his identity. “We thought it was odd that instead of telling us stuff that mattered out in the real world, like making potions and flying broomsticks, we were instead being told why microtransactions, day one DLC and forcing players to stay online for a single-player game were financially beneficial. Honestly, we’re surprised no-one figured out he was being used as a vessel for Lord Ordermore any sooner”

Currently whittling through the candidates to replace Donatello, the board members told us of their new rigourous screening process. “We’re just going to ask them if they’re being demonically possessed. We’ve eliminated three applicants already”.

About the author…
After being bitten by a radioactive games journalist, Cottingly Welles used her powers for profit, until her uncle was killed by N4G fanboys she had failed to show her tits to, deciding instead to GTFO. Learning that with great power comes great review codes, Cottingly writes not for profit, but for justice.

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