+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 4 of 4

Thread: A relgious nutjobs take on Scooby Doo

  1. #1
    Never at his post. Rynstex is a jewel in the rough Rynstex is a jewel in the rough Rynstex is a jewel in the rough Rynstex's Avatar
    Location
    Azeroth
    Posts
    1,413

    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: Rynstex PSN ID: Rynstex Steam ID: Rynstex

    Default A relgious nutjobs take on Scooby Doo

    As Hollywood prepares to release the new film, "Scooby Doo," we think it's important for Christians to understand some of the hidden messages in the cartoon series that Landover Baptist Creation Scientists and Youth Directors have spent the last 30 years of their lives uncovering. It goes without saying that most Christians already know that the term, "Scooby Doo," was adopted by the homosexual community in the late 1970's. "Scooby Doo" is Sodomite slang for "feces roll."

    There is no easy way of saying this, but a "feces roll" is when a group of naked homosexual “men” get together in a public park, lay out a large plastic mat, poop all over it, and roll around in it until they have orgasms or are busted by the police. Some homosexuals save their feces in plastic bags and keep them in the refrigerator for weeks to prepare for such an event.

    One doesn't have to look too far to see why the homosexual community was so quick in adopting "Scooby Doo." The cartoon is chock full of decadence. It really doesn't take a theologian to see that each character in the cartoon series represents a perverse member of society. There is "Shaggy," a skinny junkie who is always sleepy, hungry, and paranoid. If you look closely enough, you can actually see the needle marks on his arms where he would inject a liquified form of "scooby snacks" which were really nothing more than a mixture of cocaine and heroin. Shaggy would even feed the dog (which is G-o-d spelled backwards and an occult way of referring to Satan) these cocktails as well. At times, Shaggy would be so high, he would even think the dog was talking to him.

    Another character in the series, Thelma, the little bull-dyke, represents the feminist movement. Hollywood makes everyone's job easier here because they never try to hide the fact that feminists are nothing more than ugly-looking women with glasses who are always reading books and bossing people around. Our lone Christian mole in Hollywood tells us that executives were even considering talk show host and human hippo, Rosie O'Donnell, for the role of Thelma.

    In the character of Fred, we are subjected to a cartoon depiction of the typical homosexual male. His choice in clothing alone is enough to raise the eyebrows of any concerned Christian parent. Further evidence exists in his lack of interest in the character of Daphney, a female prostitute along for the ride who never has anything signficant to offer the group other than a harlot's smile and, sadly, unclothed cartoon legs that Landover Baptist Youth Director, Richard N. Moff, reports, "cause arousal in young boys even before they reach puberty."

    The characters of "Scooby Doo" travel in a van (an enclosed vehichle suggesting deviant activity occuring within) from town to town looking for ghosts and witches and consulting with people who are familair with spirits. It's always been a carefully packaged television program that introduces innocent young children to the occult. We could go on about countless Christian horror stories where grown adults fall prostate on the altar of Jesus and plead His precious blood over addictions to homosexuality, witchcraft, beastiality, drugs, prostitution, cartoon pornography, and liberalism that can all be traced back to being seduced by the Scooby Doo cartoon series as a child, but entire books could be written on the subject.

    We place this message of Christian love and experience here only because we know that Hollywood is preparing to unleash this terror from Hell on an already suffering Christian Nation. We urge you to protest vocally, and protest in silence by putting the $7 you would have paid to see the film, "Scooby Doo," into the offering plate at your local Bible-believing Baptist Church on Sunday morning.
    I'm all for do whatever you want, believe in whatever you want but sometimes I can't help but think a global euthanization program would solve so many problems if handled correctly.
    [Good Job Boots]

  2. #2
    procrasturbator pix3lboy is on a distinguished road pix3lboy's Avatar
    Location
    Northants
    Posts
    1,686

    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: Pix3lboy PSN ID: Pix3lboy01 Steam ID: Pix3lboy Raptr ID: pix3lboy

    Default

    There is no easy way of saying this, but a "feces roll" is when a group of naked homosexual “men” get together in a public park, lay out a large plastic mat, poop all over it, and roll around in it until they have orgasms or are busted by the police. Some homosexuals save their feces in plastic bags and keep them in the refrigerator for weeks to prepare for such an event.
    What the fuck?! that's the weirdest sex act I've ever heard (and I've heard of a few).

    entire books could be written on the subject.
    Can they? Really? In all honesty, I doubt anyone could even write one book on the subject, unless it was in the fiction section.

    protest in silence by putting the $7 you would have paid to see the film, "Scooby Doo," into the offering plate at your local Bible-believing Baptist Church on Sunday morning.
    so basically this is all because the Baptist Church don't have enough money to pay their bills then.

  3. #3
    The Skoda of GamingLives ZeroMark is a glorious beacon of light ZeroMark is a glorious beacon of light ZeroMark is a glorious beacon of light ZeroMark is a glorious beacon of light ZeroMark is a glorious beacon of light ZeroMark is a glorious beacon of light ZeroMark's Avatar
    Location
    Glasgow, Scotland
    Posts
    3,237

    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: ZeroMark172 Steam ID: ZeroMark

    Default

    Some folk are just so full of hate. Its pretty sad really.
    Do or do not. There is no try.
    - Yer maw

  4. #4
    Will suck dick for Rep Ste is a splendid one to behold Ste is a splendid one to behold Ste is a splendid one to behold Ste is a splendid one to behold Ste is a splendid one to behold Ste is a splendid one to behold Ste's Avatar
    Location
    Sheffield, England
    Posts
    2,393

    Gamer IDs

    Gamertag: Blinky82 PSN ID: SteMarsh82 Steam ID: Blinky82

    Default

    Is this for real? I'm actually impressed how much thought has gone into this. If you can call it that.

+ Reply to Thread

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts