Yep, our friend Zero is suffering from work-related boredom, so to keep him occupied, here is some random nonsense to help him pass his time in an entertaining way. First up...
A picture of a cactus that looks like a cock. Always good comedy mileage there.
Next, read up on the history of cake to help pass the time in an educational way:
Now find out how to survive that likeliest of Glasgow scenarios... a shipwreck:
Don't say we don't do anything for you, young man.